Lets start with their 'website'. Pathetic. An utter farce. They have nothing that resembles useful information except the showtimes, all presented in the nastiest possible layout. Then we have the cinemas themselves. Mucky, filled with degenerate scum who insist on having loud mobile conversations with people who would seem to be in the very same theatre. And their concession stands... Popcorn, warm cola and if you are brave enough, the dodgiest nachos in the history of existence, all for a rather steep price.
All of which may be acceptable, if they played a half decent movie once in a while. As I write this, I understand, courtesy of the Bahraincinema.com webdebacle, that their new releases are: Crossing Over - a pointless drama that wants to be like that Crash movie, starring the has-been of the century Harrison Indy Jones Ford; and, get this... My Mom's New Boyfriend. Yes, that's right- My Mom's New Boyfriend. While it may have stars of relative merit including Antonio Desperado Banderas and Meg Sleepless Ryan, both of the online reviews for this unreleased joke are beyond negative. Yes, that's right.. both. TWO. In the world of the mighty Internet, only TWO people decided to weigh in on the awfulness that Bahrain Cinema blesses us with. Here is a quote from the first of the two reviews: "My Mom's New Boyfriend essentially comes off as an unmitigated disaster virtually from its opening frames."
It was never released on cinema anywhere else. But here, they make it look like a treat. Ingrates.
Yeah, so Crossing Over, the going-to-be flop, was released, according to the GDN, simultaneoulsy with the US. Woo fecking hooo. Who cares? That a film I never heard about and common consensus indicates is festering tripe is released at the same time as the US of A does not make me suddenly want to watch it.
Argghhh..
But then, when they decide to play a movie of merit.. one of the vague few times I consider gracing the big screen with my presence... they cut the hell out of it. Literally. Everything. Whether it was offensive or not. Whether it was integral to the storyline or not. Whatever they feel like chopping out, they chop out.
But that doesn't stop them. They keep multiplying. Like a plague. The Bahrain City Center will be home to the biggest cinema in the region, with a whopping 20 screens to screen censored pointlessness for a hefty chunk of change. And that's not all... We also get a VIP cinema. Yes, because as we know, important people like to watch bad movies too. The list goes on... according to the illegible press releases, the new cinema will house a 'reputable coffee house franchise' (my bet is on McCosta), 'variety of snacks' (popcorn), 'munches like crepes' (uhh.. crepes) and who knows what else.
Which brings me to one of my favourite tales of stupidity in recent months: The new BCC cinema 20 screen thing was supposed to be open when the mall opened way back in September of last year. But they had a problem. They built the theatres, installed the screens and did everything else you are supposed to do when opening a new cinema. Except for one thing... They forgot to install sound insulation. Seriously. 20 screens with state-of-the-art electronics and superduper sounds systems, but no insulation. So they had to rip the walls out and start again. Seriously. Supersized stupidity in a bucket of heavily salted (or sweetened) dumb. Would you like a coke with that?
Cineco, with their big spending and pointless excess seem to be forgetting one crucial detail (aside from intelligence of course)- movies. Find some good movies. Soon they will have 20 more screens for our mindlessly bored eyes to gaze upon, but how many people are going to go out of their way to watch 'My Mom's New Boyfriend'?
If u don't like it, go back home!
ReplyDeleteseriosuly ur fuckin theater sucks.and if i dont go back home what will you do loser.the theater movie resolution sucks and even the sound effects are the worst
DeleteYeah... but, well... I am Bahraini. And I don't like it. Suggestions?
ReplyDeleteI have lived in the USA for more than 12 years, what we have in Bahrain is the same as the US if not even better.
ReplyDeletewell it was announced that the new cinema in BCC will open on the 26th of november (hopefully)...i guess we just need to wait and see howz it gonna be there!! hopefully better than that dodgy seef cinema!!
ReplyDeleteBahrain cinema website is riddled with viruses aswell. My computer won't even open it.
ReplyDeleteThe popcorn stands suck aswell and the service is even worse. How about DANA cinema? What a joke.
15-20 Bahrainis walking around with flashlights and one poor girl working the popcorn stand with 100 people in line.
3 times I've gone...the same scenario. NEVER AGAIN!
And get some butter for the popcorn!!!!!!!!
Argh, YES. I hate how they chop out scenes. The scene jumps are so obvious & unsubtle & lacking grace it makes me want to rip my eyes out.
ReplyDeleteI don't even get the VIP part. Extra 2 BD for what? Bigger seats? Sheesh, what a waste.
And don't even get me started on their so-called "service".
I agree on the above comment though, the website does have a virus. My anti-virus won't even let me load the damn site.
OK, you have way too much spare time on your hands to write a bloody blog on how bad "you" think Bahrain is, have some respect you looser. As you hate Bahrain so much, I can think of two (2) possible reasons. 1) you are English and 2) you are still English and a whining POM. As the other comment says, if you don't like it, GO HOME...
ReplyDeleteSeems rather racist.
DeleteI might have too much spare time on my hands, but that's my problem, not yours. And, as already mentioned in these here comments, I am Bahraini. I don't like it BECAUSE this is home. Ignorant self-serving patriotism just aint my thing. Good luck with that. Oh, and what exactly is a 'looser'?
ReplyDeleteOne more thing... how much spare time do you have to trawl the interweb for obscure blogs where you can vent your misplaced xenophobia?
ReplyDeleteDon't mind the previous anon (not that I think anyone paid any attention to that stupidity. Could be a Cineco employee for all anyone knows, hah.)
ReplyDeletePosts like those show the 'effectiveness' (at a loss for a better word right now) of your posts and the response it can elicit from its readers. Keep it up.
You tell 'im Dude...hahaha.
ReplyDeleteI am surprised at the criticism. I am an American, but I like the Cineco cinema at the City Centre Mall. The seats, even in the non-VIP theatres are nicer than most American theatres, the steep slope inside the theatre ensures you are not looking at the back of someone's head for two hours. It is also nice to be able to pick your seats before you buy your ticket.
ReplyDeleteSure, I would like butter on the popcorn, but they do have a large selection from Pizza to Crepe's. The cokes could be bigger.
The tickets are too expensive, and Bahraini's don't seem to have caught on the prohibition on cell phones while the movie is playing. I haven't noticed the censoring yet, but that may be because Toy Story 3 and the Sorcerer's Apprentice didn't have anything to censor.
The movies only seem a week or so behind the U.S. release
I wonder if "The Dude" would post an update now that the cinema has actually opened.
I agree with "The Dude". It's freedom speech and expression, that I find some of the people who have commented don't understand. Bahrain is a very closed society and is not accepting or tolerant at all of other cultures. People in Bahrain are missing the bigger picture: justice, liberty, treating people as equal and with respect. I am sure things are seen like this in other parts of the world, but it's more obvious in the Middle Eastern countries. People only go there for only one of the two reasons: income or study. Once that's done, they leave. You have to live in other parts of the world to understand where "the dude" is coming from.
ReplyDeleteIf the cinemas in Bahrain are no good, why not go to Saudi Arabia, it's so much bigger :)
ReplyDeleteI have recently returned to Bahrain for work (I'm a US Citizen) and I wasn't as disappointed by my Cineco experience, overall. I found that it's worth going to the VIP theaters simply because most of the local Bahrainis (who have all the manners and politeness of a pack of rabid monkeys) avoid the extra cost, so I don't have to (usually) deal with their rude use of cell phones in the theater (they act like cell phones are some magical high-tech device they simply can't live without, LOL).
ReplyDeleteThe big issue (aside from the crappy snack-bar, which goes without saying here in Bahrain) is simply that they don't get good movies here in any kind of timely fashion. Instead they waste at least a third of the theaters on gawd-awful low-budget Arabic or Indian crap. Ugh. No thanks.
Good ol' Bahrain, the more it tries to change, the more it still sucks. Sigh.
Funny you mention monkeys, im a bahraini living in Boston, MA.. And i would take ppl using their phones in the theater than Barbarians throwing up in the movie theater like i experienced in boston twice ! #nastystuff
DeleteUsually the monkies on the phone "Ya Halla" come from next door holding hands while they watch the movies irritating SoBs
ReplyDeletehello please dont blame i live in bahrain but i am from barzil.....the cinema massive
ReplyDelete