So by now you know that Bahrain thinks the only way to learn them plebs 'bout morality is to censor the hell out of the Internet. Apparently, every second site in the great wide web is guilty of 'violating the regulations and laws of the Kingdom of Bahrain'.
First it was Google Translate, which by the way, IS STILL BLOCKED. Because translating stuff is bad, mmmkay. If you translate, you understand. If you understand, you learn. And we're not allowed to learn now, are we?
The complaints persist. Tech forums are bad, because you can, y'know, learn about technology and get a step ahead of them censorship Nazis. Art forums are bad, because art is like, y'know, porn. Fashion sites are bad, because fashion is like, well, manikins, which we all know pervy boys like to drool over. Gambing is obviously evil, and nothing whatsoever like purchasing a fifty dinar raffle ticket in Bahrain Duty Free. Politics is bad, because it's opinionated and political 'n stuff.
And now, the I Cant Believe They're So Stupid award of the week goes once again to the Ministry of Culture and Information. Why?
Because, even though they have not blocked the overused, timedestroying social network that is Facebook, should you try to do something stupid like deactivate your account, you cant. Seriously. It is apparently fine to do a little online social networking, but it is ILLEGAL to close your account. That's right... if you are fed up with Facebook, tough shit. Closing your account 'violates the regulations and laws of the Kingdom of Bahrain'. Wait.. no... as I write this I tried once again to deactivate the diseased Facebook and it worked. Damn. I'll have to find something else to complain about.
Lets go back to Google Translate. Yeah, I know... everyone knows that Google Translate is blocked. But WHY IS IT STILL BLOCKED? Either the Ministry has a financial stake in Berlitz or they are terminally retarded. How can they possibly justify Google Translate being blocked for over a month? Maybe there is a word, a secret word, that when translated will bring about the apocalypse. A secret Bahraini word. A word that only we know. And by blocking Google Translate - that evil Internet oracle that translates everything (bad words included) - the Ministry is saving humanity.
If only we could figure out a way to turn ignorance into energy. We could save the world. All it would take is one little ignorance converter in one pointless Ministry. But who would build such a device? Not us, because as we all know, tekkie stuff is guilty of 'violating the regulations and laws of the Kingdom of Bahrain'.
Which brings us the the SITE BLOCKED screen of doom. They used to tell us what laws were being violated, but unfortunately, people can read. And when those damn literate people discovered that their legal argument was farcical, the almighty Ministry decided to do what they do best... censor. They censored themselves. Idiots.
But what exactly are these 'regulations' of which they speak? Bahrain has regulations? Nobody told me. I know there are regulations in the financial sector and the telecommunication sector and wherever else, but the Kingdom of Bahrain, as a whole, has regulations? I would very much like to see a copy of the Official Regulations of the Kingdom of Bahrain. How entertaining that'd be...
What next? Terms and conditions? Waivers?
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This scares me... Knowing that someone is blogging about “why Bahrain sucks’..
ReplyDeleteIf I may ask, are you a Bahraini yourself? Ethnically speaking.
I wouldn’t think that anyone with such a great deal of exaggeration will write all these comments about some things people don’t really mind about …
But I will have to agree about the banning of “Bad Sites”. It was completely unnecessary.
As a western expat, Bahrainis are often kind and friendly people, it just depends on if you are kind to them, they welcome you into their house and offer a cup of tea[even if you just left a coffee shop].
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA your blog is amazing. Everything you said, i've actually complained about.Some on the same exact points, using the same retarded quotes from our shcmarliament. Amazing..keep up the good work. Reading this is like therapy.
ReplyDeleteBlogger, people like you make "bahrain suck".
ReplyDeletelearn to appreciate, dnt get the negative .. instead look at the positives! youl find many wonderful things. Bahrain sucks to you because maybe u dnt know how to enjoy urself here.
I think people like you make society bad, go out have fun and look at thte positives ul find a lot more to bahrain than u thought with ur narrow thinking... its people like u that make bahrain "bad"
Zain.. I beg to differ. Criticism makes Bahrain better. I admit I can be overly negative, but surely a rose-tinted view of the world is more harmful than complaining. If everyone saw everything as perfect, nothing would ever improve. If people like me make Bahrain bad because, as you assume, we don't know how to have fun, then your thinking is far narrower than mine. Thanks for the comment. The dude abides.
ReplyDeleteDo you think you will end up on the ministry (s)hit list? :P
ReplyDeletetarah google translate is not blocked
ReplyDeletethe third link works when u google it
hahahah
zain lool take a chill pill
Hanna, whoever you are you have no idea what you are talkin abt firstly he wasnt even makin fun of bahrainis themselves he was critisizing the government of bahrain and there very strange idiotic customs. personally i find "The Dude" a fuckin saint his articles are amazing and so god damn true he the first person tht actually took a stand and wrote wht he felt and broke out of the thought invasion this country's so called "government" has subjected us to. I only hope those bastards dont find this cuz if they'e actually smart enough to comprehend what hes talkin abt (whihc i seriously doubt) his sarcasm is to complex and dry for them to get but if the slightest chance that they do understand what hes talkin abt theyll most probably ban this blog and that would indeed suck and the irony wold be unbareable.
ReplyDeleteheeeeeeey pplz !!
ReplyDeletewho said bahrain is not suck , what is the great in bahrain ??
I agree. What the hell is up with everything being blocked? My homepage for a while was my Canadian online school's website (I recently moved here), and it was blocked. I filled out and sent in that form detailing why, in fact, it should not be blocked. Grr..
ReplyDeleteno one can keep looking at the positives for a long time being treated negatively .... and if its longer that what you wont even be able to peak positivity from a tiny hole, and this is when the world turns hell!! make bahrain a better place, but implementing geniuine laws, about sites being blocked we have enough parental control in our houses as far as i have seen, but those who dont require everyother informative site being blocked its totally unappreciated!. there is positivity about bahrain ofcourse, but negativity also must be disclosed so that an appropriate action is taken and this negativity is turned into a positive .. thing! watever. people of bahrain are highly social i agree, but not enough action is being taking at higher levels. these criticism aren't destructive, but rather constructive about what out local people are capable and should be holding those posts in the ministry. its obvious to have powers in right hands for the having a better bahrain. I am not saying this as of shiites or sunnis holding the posts, im saying whoever is capable of. the sites being blocked, it actually doesnt matter me much because i can get what i want one way or the other *evil grin*, bahrain doesnt suck as a country, but i see extreme action required at higher level decission making. cheers and yeah, it hurts our hearts probably thats why we wanna scream ..love ya'll comments :)rebbel till you get justice \,,/,_(~,-)
ReplyDeleteAHAHAHAHA AYAA 3ALAAAIK
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteGoogle translate was blocked at that time because it can be used as a proxy server to view other sites.
ReplyDelete